'And as we wind on down the road '-Led Zeppelin

After about a couple of couple of couple of months i am writing here to lay to rest the myths that were circulating of my blog's death (so what if i started them,they are myths all the same). Its been a (any adjective you can think of comes here) few months, what with me going to interviews, followed by heartbreak of not getting through them, followed by joy of getting through some of them, followed by workaholic times with project report submission(word of advice, don't start work on the project two days before submission, give yourself at least four days. Anything beyond 5 days and you are wasting precious time) and then extreme sorrow of leaving behind a place that has come to be your home for 4 years. And that is what i am gonna talk bout. My 4 years in college.

I can still remember my first day, when my dad had told me how the next 4 years would get over before i knew it, and boy was he right. Now that i have come to the end of it all, i realize how 4 years have gone by. How what was to me a barren piece of land in the middle of nowhere on highway number who-gives-a-damn leading to who-the-hell-cares land had turned into a beautiful place i called my home. Not because of praise-be-the-lord miracle nor because of some crazy election drive(even politicians don't give a crap, well actually that's kinda expected) but because of the people who shared the place with me, people with whom i came to identify a new phase of my life, people with whom i know i shall share a special bond for the rest of my life(people who eat crap together share such a bond). The best part of studying in a national institute is the variety of people u get to meet. I can safely say that i have spent the last 4 years with some of the brightest minds in the country(and that's not counting the guys on dope).

Today the impression i have of my college is drastically different from what it was four years ago, and very obviously that has nothing got to do with academics. But in every other way these four years are largely responsible for making me the man i am today. For instance i switched from Indian Standard Time to Dutch National Time(inspired by Eurotrip, true story), i stopped studying a week before the exams, moving on from 4 days, to the weekend before to the morning of the exam during my final sem. I went from half a cup of weak coffee a day to three cups of black coffee after i brushed my teeth and as many cups in the day as i could. I went from first-to-arrive first-bencher to rarely-arriving-last-bencher. I went from the being the teacher's pet to the teacher's worst nightmare ever in which the pet bites off her head and then runs away with it. Anyone reading this must think college ruined my life, but those thinking so do not know that the biggest lesson and probably the most important lesson that this place has taught me is to live on my own, to make my own decisions and to realize that those decisions can actually bite me in the ass, and that pain does not manifest immediately when my mind is 'bright'. And all this only after my second year into college (my first year got lost in JEE books).

To the friends i made over there i owe some of the best memories of my life. My wing-mates, my department mates, my juniors, my seniors and my teachers(trust me, messing with a teacher's head can be a wonderful memory). Those late night table tennis matches during exams, the gossip sessions in Diamond 14 which got relocated to Emerald 36, the drunken fiestas (you know who i am talking about), the walking into class half an hour late without even looking at the teacher, sitting in the last bench messaging or solving crosswords or solving T.I.M.E papers or throwing chalk bits or sleeping or all of the above, those quizzes and those near misses(or as george carlin says near hits) and so so much more, events that littered the last four years of my life, events that i can never forget, events that put a smile on my face,events that brought a tear to the eye, overall events that reminded me that every single moment i spent over there will become memories for a lifetime.

Now as i leave this place, the empty corridors remind me that it will never be the same, and as we move on and we meet new people along the way, the mind shall always come back to those 4 years ,in that barren land on highway number who-gives-a-damn going to who-gives-a-crap land, that i owe my life to. Thank you for everything.

Dead or Alive?

To dispel myths circulating in imaginary circles about my death i am here today posting about, well not being dead.
I have not posted anything for a very long time now, since my CAT results came out to be particular. The reason being that i was preparing for the Interviews. My next post shall be about the interview process once their outcome come out on April 10th.
Today's post is about a seemingly impossible achievement that only i could have accomplished.

As mentioned earlier the outcome of the IIM interviews are soon to be expected, and going by the unpredictable nature of the admission process i make it a point to check for the results every day just in case those weirdos decide to declare earlier. Today was no different, i was going around hopping from IIM website to website searching for tell tale signs of results declaration when i landed upon the IIMC website which had a link to results. I clicked on it without giving it a second thought and as it turned out without a second read as well.

The page dutifully opened and the form appeared where i had to fill in my TR no and my DOB(as if my TR no was not unique enough they want to know the DOB to confirm, considering there are about 3 million ppl born on the same day as me it is clear that the IIMs have a decided lack of common sense in designing websites). I entered the required data so fast that after i typed the digits, the computer was still processing the previous typed entry. The dreaded result page appeared and it read "Your name does not appear either in the list of waitlisted candidates nor in the list of selected candidates to the PGP programmes in IIMC".

It took sometime to register. It did and i was not markedly devastated, just a little disappointed. But i thought i'd spread the good news to my other friends who took the exam. And the news spread like wildfire.

The shocker was that none of my friends had got a seat, the same line appeared on each of their pages. Unfortunate.

The revelation was made by my dear Kashmiri friend(when he is not planning to take over India he is quite the sensible guy) when he read a line in big bold letters on the result page that mentioned that the Interviews for the OBC candidates would be on the 15th of May, the previous year.Considering that the result page was last year's and that none of us had taken the exam last year i dont think it was that big a shock.

I April Fooled Myself. Considering i am so clever it took about three days after April Fool's day to acheive the task but i did it nevertheless.

I am still reeling from the hate messages from my friends. :)

The burden of humility

I am Back, seems to be the biggest craze on social networking sites. Now that the holidays season is over, people are returning to their regular lives. Some are coming back from their homes, some from their natives, others from tours. I personally am coming back from the loo. Not that I spent my entire vacation there but in this context it counts since before writing this I was taking the trash out.
Now that we have established where I am coming from let us move on to the topic of today, humility. How does a person stay humble while extolling his achievements? When you are with your peers in front of whom you have to say what u have achieved, how do you do it without getting labeled as a snob? Let us consider Mr. Obama and some situations he might face.
‘Hi, I am the President of the U.S.A, the most powerful country in the world’. Snob!
‘Hi, I am the people’s choice to lead the greatest country in the world’. Snob!
‘Hi, I am the President of the U. S.A’. Snob!
‘Hi, I am the President’. Snob!
‘Hi, I dunno why the people chose me but I am stuck with this job now’. Idiot!!
In such situations I have often found that not being forthright helps. Don’t start telling about yourself, like for instance
‘Hi, I am Obama. Who are you?’
This works most of the time but say Obama came across the Chinese premier,
‘Hi, I am Obama. Who are you?’
‘Yes, that’s right. Hu I are’ (He is a Chinese commie, how good can his English be?)
Then what does one do, or how does one say what he has to? The objective must be to coax the person in front to ask you the question. In that case you are merely answering his question, so you wouldn’t have done it otherwise and hence no reason to be called a snob. So we can start off by asking him what we want him to ask us and hope for reciprocation.
‘Hi, I am Obama and you are?’
This is a good ploy, until you apply this to Fidel Castro.
‘Hi, I am Obama and you are?’
‘Yes, I am Cuba’ (80 years of smoking Cubans, god knows what he hears)
So now we have exhausted almost all our options, we come to the final one. Don’t speak until spoken unto.
‘ ‘.
‘Oh you poor thing, are you mute?’
‘No, ma’am. I am Obama’.
‘Never heard of the disease son, but I am sure you will get well soon’
That’s all options exhausted. So now that we have confirmed there is no way to say anything without being misinterpreted I am gonna say it anyway.
I got the results of my CAT exam today. Got 4 calls from Ahmedabad, Bangalore, Calcutta and from Kozhikode(I got B,A,C,K). (Surprised look) Snob!?

Greek for Dummies

Greek for Dummies
‘Sau’Crates: A binging champion who found enlightenment after his 100th crate of wine when he saw Lord Bud the Wiser, hence named himself Saucrates or ‘100’ crates. Spawned a host of other philosophers who followed in his footsteps, which was easy since there was a wine bottle next to each one of them
Plate-O: Student of Saucrates, invented the circular plate. He was never able to reach the heights of his teacher but however left his impression for centuries to come when he sat on the wet parthenon concrete.
A wristbottle: The youngest student of Plate-O, he would carry a water bottle on his wrist when he attended classes. Even though in later life he stopped the practice, the name stuck. He was the first to propose that animals have social classes, an early symptom of a fractured psyche.
‘Zee’Us: The drunk exhibitionist of Greece, he was very popular with the people of his age. He would imagine himself in various forms during his drunken revelries. Contributor to more than 75% of the current Greek gene pool.
Pussydon: He was editor of ‘Sheesh’, the teen magazine. Often referring to himself as Lord of the Sheesh, he commanded a lot of respect in social circles and was the reference for latest trends in fashion. Pussydon was brother of ‘Zee’Us and Hanes.
Hanes: He was the Lord of the Underpants. Responsible for revolutionary designs in Underpants he started the X and Y front designs.
Homo’er: The hesitating gay poet who wrote and rode in epic proportions. Introduced mankind to bestialism in his writings when a bunch of men sprung out of a horse.
Ikearush: The swedish exchange student in Alexandria, he was son of DearDallas the american contractor. He died trying to ascertain the melting height of wax.
Helen: The sluttiest broad in the Medittereanean, was the calender model for the port of Athens where a thousand ships were launched in all.
A’chillies: The hottest young gigolo of Greece, he had a disturbed childhood when his mother dipped him in sticks. The scars he suffered left him red for the rest of his like hence the nickname.
Minuter: The fearsome flea who lived in the centre of the Lavarinth, the public toilet till he was flushed out of his lair by Faeceus. The Minuter was responsible for a large number of deaths in Greece when he sent out his minions to infest people.
AtHen: She was the patron saint of the poultry farmers,believed to be the daughter of ‘Zee’Us she had a temple constructed for her. This temple is believed to be the progenitor for modern day dairy farms.
Afro-diet: Noted black dietician and prominent human rights activist. She launched a massive campaign for black rights when she was thrown from Uranus into the sea by Cronies.
Herr Coolies: The German hippy godfather. He is said to have smoked twelve different varieties of Weed, a feat now known as The Twelve Weeds of Herr Coolies. A direct descendant of ‘Zee’Us, Herr Coolies is said to have been the inventor of the morphine.
Feel free to add your own characters in the comments.
Cheers

Black or Green

A sabbatical can add perspective in one’s life. I was not on one. I was absent for about a week and a half, hardly enough time to be called a sabbatical. But I guess time is not of the essence when what one is looking for is an open- minded view, a perspective.
So what could I have mused on during my stay with my cousins? Something on familial ties maybe? Yes, that too but what I am writing about here today is not the stay, I am talking about the trip. My journey to my natives had me take a train journey across three states along the eastern coast of India. Each state unique in its own way, but I was not looking for differences. I was looking for similarities, rather I saw similarities and that’s what I speak on today.
Every train journey I have taken has inevitably passed through the countryside, the fields and the villages. This one was no different. In all three states, there were fields, lush green. They may have been growing different crops but to me they were just fields, green and the source of my grub. These images were not permanent. Interspersed with the green colour was the white, and grey and black of the cities. Urban settlements on what was probably once a farmland. What intrigued me most, in fact what intrigues me still is the question the balance of green and black pose. How much of each is required for a progressing, stable society? This sounds contradictory, so let me rephrase it, how much is needed for a steadily progressing society? Where should the boundary be, or where should it have been between green and black?
So I did some thinking and came up with a list of pros and cons of each. I am not judging, nor am I imposing my opinion on anyone which is why I would request all those reading to leave there thoughts in the comments.
Let’s start with green. If there were a lot of green it would imply that the country had a predominantly agriculture dependent economy. Exports would be agri products and variants of it. People would be living in or near the farms and urbanization would be minimal. How would that affect the country? Agri based economy is stable. Because the bottom line is no matter what the world does, it cannot stop eating. So that ensures a steady export business. Yes the recession will affect the prices of the fertilizers, the necessary material will be dearer, and food will become costlier. But the good thing about agriculture is that productivity is not as dependent on the economics of the world as is industry. The farmers will produce the same, they may however pay more. But we have already established that income to the country will be more or less stable. So the government can bear the load of the farmer on its shoulder. So all is rosy. But is it? The downside of this is that progress is at a snail’s pace. The economy is stable but not growing. So while the world keeps going ahead during the good times, this country stays behind. It is like a seasonal tree that bears fruit only in winter. The rest of the year it is just a tree doing nothing. But when winter does come, everyone turn to it for nourishment. So the question here is how much can we afford to be like this tree? Can we afford to be depended upon only during times of recession?
If not then we must start urbanizing, and industrializing the nation. Progress is ensured in this economy. We keep pace with developments in the world and grow as everyone else does. We generate the technology that runs fuels development. This ensure quick bucks in quicker time. This alternative sounds wonderful so why not industrialize and depend on the agri countries to feed us ? This has a downside too. Industry is very much dependent on the world economy, a flutter in any countries economy and it affects us. This is not stable option although quick progress is guaranteed. When the world goes into recession we dive in too head and toe. Prices spiral out of control, and we pay through our noses for essential commodities. Fuel, and everything that runs on it becomes costlier affecting nearly everything in sight. So can we afford to live with the uncertainties?
How can we strike a balance? There are a million different opinions and thousand different solutions not all viable though. What I propose is a simple plan. Both have to be implemented which is obvious but they need not be independent of each other. They can be boosting to each other. Industry can be developed around agriculture and agriculture can fuel industry. Research can be done to implement bio-fuels more efficiently. Genetically modified plants can be used to fuel great industries and industry can be used to increase productivity and efficiency in agriculture. So when one falls the other can be used to pull it up and get it running. The plan sounds simple enough but I know there are lots of things involved and lots of factors that I cannot fathom, but I know that man’s reach is beyond his imagination.
Here is hoping for a better tomorrow! Cheers!!